Your kid is gender-expansive, and you are certain that your role is to support them in their gender journey. No doubt, you want to be the best ally for your kid and you’ll do everything to see them thrive.
For most parents, especially when you first find out, your kid is often developmentally far ahead of you in this journey. Most kids have dealt with the issue for a while before coming out to you–learning about it, and now manifesting it–but for you, this could all be new.
Suddenly, a wrong pronoun or term comes out of your mouth and all your efforts to be supportive seem to have gone down the drain; to make it worse, your kid feels hurt.
Is the language that important? Absolutely! With language we express that we see our child; that’s why using the wrong language renders your kid invisible or could be taken as you not seeing them for who they are.
But that wasn’t your intention at all! Hurting your kid is the last thing you want…
The opposite occurs when you’re perceived as someone who did their homework and makes your best effort to address them properly. Using proper language shows them that you care. Can you still make honest mistakes? Of course. And there are nurturing ways of dealing with those, too.
Should you be concerned that affirming your child by using their requested language will send them down a road of no return, this couldn’t be farther than the truth. In fact, using their language makes it more likely they will trust you as they explore and can change their path without incident. It’s also one of the best things you can do for their emotional wellbeing, regardless of where their gender lands.
We know it can be difficult to keep up with the terminology and if you’ve been in this situation you know it can be an intimidating task. But don’t despair, it’s not at all unsavable and you’re not alone, you just need proper information and skills to affirm your kid on their journey.
For that reason, based on our clinical experience we have created a support network and resource hub to equip you with the tools to become the best supporter of your trans kid.
If you want to show up for your kid in the best possible way just click here and join us to learn more about gender health for you and your kid…
…and receive our Glossary of Gender Terminology for Parents!